“So, you can see,” she continued, “why I would be hesitant to continue something so new with you. It was just so fresh, so unsettled, that I felt like I would just drag you down and waste your time.”
“Waste my time?”
“Yeah. You could be with anyone. You could spend your time partying and having fun with your friends. With girlfriends. Not with some woman who chose to raise her sister’s baby and voluntarily sits at home to watch crappy TV and eat ramen.”
“I love crappy TV,” I muttered. “And ramen. Just don’t tell Derek.”
She laughed. “Is that the chef?”
“It is.”
“I still get them a little confused.”
“So do I, sometimes,” I joked. “Seriously though, that’s such an extreme choice.”
“I know,” she said. “But she’s my sister. I have to take care of her. And she is not equipped to be a mother right now. Maybe never. That baby’s best chance is with me. Besides, how was I supposed to drag you into the middle of all this, all this drama and insanity, after one amazing night in bed? It just made so much more sense to just walk away. Walk away and never think about it again if I could.”
“How well did that work out for you?”
She made a face that didn’t seem all that joking and muttered under her breath. “Well, yeah, it turns out you’re irresistible.”
She looked back up, and I took a moment to soak her reaction in. She sounded so flippant, but her face showed she was clearly upset.
“Alright,” I said, setting the coffee down on the table and sitting on the edge of the chair. She looked at me with pleading eyes and continued to pet Simon. “I’m making an executive decision.”
“A what?” she asked.
“An executive decision,” I said. “About you. About today. Tonight, rather.” I looked outside to see the sun had begun to set and the evening was settling around us. If she had booked a plane home for the evening, she was likely already running late. But if she had picked a hotel, then I had an idea.
“What decision?” she asked. She didn’t seem like she was going to argue whatever it was I was going to say. She was too confused, too tired and stressed.
“Why don’t you go get your stuff out of the car. I know you drove straight here. Go grab your things and come back here and we will sleep on it. You can get a good night’s rest somewhere without the expectation of your sister and the future will haunt you, and when we wake up in the morning, maybe it will all make a little more sense,” I said. “How does that sound?”
“That sounds amazing,” she said, a look of clear relief coming across her face. “I just need some time to think, I think.”
“I can help with that,” I said. “Come on, let’s get dressed. I’ll help you bring your things in.”
“Thank you. Let’s go.”
24
Danica
The morning came, and I woke up in the bed with Kane curled around me. I dozed for a while, enjoying the safety and comfort of his arms. Unlike the other two times we had ended up in his bed, this time, there was no sex involved. Granted, we had gone to bed not long after our conversation, but I had no doubt that Kane could have been raring to go again if he wanted to. Instead, he seemed content to let me separate sex from the equation, to think about what we had talked about. He even offered to sleep on the couch.
In the end, I told him it was silly for him to give up his bed just because I was in it. We curled up together, fully clothed for once, and I slept deeper than I had in a long time.
But that sleep didn’t come with clarity. My eyes fluttered open, and I stared at the far wall while I tried to figure out how I felt. If I felt any different. If I felt the same.
Nothing was coming easily to me. Just more questions. All the clarity I hoped to have was still eluding me, and I shifted in the bed, enough to rouse Kane from his sleep.
“Hey,” he said, rolling onto his back. “What time is it?”
“Early. I don’t know exactly. My phone is dead.”
“I have some extra charging cords,” he said. “Alex gives us these all-in-one things all the time, so we have backups everywhere.”
“If you don’t mind,” I said, sitting up. “I just don’t want Jaz to call me and freak out when I don’t answer.”
“Sure, sure,” Kane said. “I’ll get us some coffee going.”
I nodded as Kane slid out of bed and headed for the bedroom door. Even in a plain white T-shirt and a pair of loose boxer shorts, he was still a magnificent sight to behold. His shoulders were wide and muscular, and the tattoo could be seen, dark underneath the white shirt and flowing down his arm. He reached behind him, lifting the shirt some to scratch his back, and I caught a glimpse of his well-defined muscles on his side, moving up to his chest.